Publetariat

2009: The Year That Was (Jan. – April)

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This post, from Mick Rooney, originally appeared on his POD, Self-Publishing and Independent Publishing blog on 12/24/09.

So, here we go, 2009, the year that was in publishing. This is by no means a conclusive round-up, but the stories and events that caught my eye.

 
JANUARY
 
The year began with a lot of anxiety in the publishing world. There were already plenty of rumours and murmurings of editors walking the plank, staff layoffs, and publishers dramatically cutting back on their title commitments for the coming twelve months. We always knew 2009 would be a year of pain and change, whether we liked it or not.
 
In January, Author Solutions, owned by equity investors Bertram Capital, continued its strategy of development and expansion in the digital print-on-demand publishing world by purchasing Xlibris, a leading publisher in self-publishing services to authors. The purchase was announced on Thursday, January 8th, by Author Solutions CEO, Kevin Weiss. Little did we know in January that Author Solutions would stay firmly in the news, give us plenty to talk about, and ultimately, provide us with the biggest story in publishing later in the year.
 
The judge presiding over the Amazon/Booksurge antitrust lawsuit requested both legal representatives to attend court in Bangor, Maine. Amazon & Booksurge filed for the lawsuit against them to be dismissed in August 2008. The Judge would eventually rule that Booklocker’s action was valid and Amazon/Booksurge had a case to answer.
 
The case was taken by Booklocker.com last year following moves by Amazon to cajole some POD publishers into using their own print-on-demand company, Booksurge, for books sold through Amazon.com in the United States. For a period of time last year some POD publishers had their ‘first party’ buy buttons removed by Amazon from their online site. The strategy of Amazon was seen as an attempt to monopolize the POD book market.
 
I mentioned in an article last Christmas that book retailers in Ireland had performed marginally better in 2008 than on previous profits for 2007. However, the early figures presented in January for the completed trade period suggested that the UK book retail trade recorded profits that were marginally down. This was to be the continued trend throughout the year with layoffs and store closures.
 
Newsstand beat Blackwells by getting their hands on the first UK Espresso Book Machine. They were confident that they could create a demand for ‘on the spot’ printed books and planned to charge £10 for a standard paperback version and £14 for a large print book. Blackwell Books, also based in the UK, had hoped to be the first company to install these machines, but following delays their first installed machine did not appear until April in their bookstore in Charing Cross, London. 
 

“The point may soon come when there are more people who want to write books than there are people who want to read them.”

 
And so wrote Motoko Rich in the New York Times, January 27th, 2009. It was one of the most widely discussed articles for a long time in publishing. Rich was writing about the rise in self-publishing and the changes the publishing industry faced. It was nice to see a well established newspaper cast a cursory eye over an area of the publishing business which has long exploded into life. You can reflect back on that article and read my own thoughts on it. 
 

Read the rest of the post, which picks up with February, on Mick Rooney‘s POD, Self-Publishing and Independent Publishing blog. Also see the May – August post, and watch the blog for an upcoming September – December post.

Writer's Night Before Christmas

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‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through my draft
Were examples of my inattention to craft
My characters all hung about without care,
In hopes that a plot point soon would be there.

 
My family were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of red herrings danced in my head.
The dog on its blanket, and the cat in my lap
Had just settled themselves for a long winter’s nap.
 
When on my computer there showed a blue screen!
(And if you use a PC, then you know what that means.)
Away to the cell phone I flew like a flash;
I dialed tech support and broke out in a rash.
 
The sales pitch that played while on hold I waited
Ensured my tech guy would be roundly berated.
That is, if he ever should come on the line.
And for this, per minute, it’s one-ninety-nine!
 
“Good evening,” he said, in a Punjab accent,
“I am happy to help you, and my name is Kent.”
More rapid than the Concorde was his troubleshoot,
I was back up and running, after one last reboot!
 
"Now Gaiman! Now, Atwood! Now, Cheever and Austen!
Salinger! O’Connor! Shakespeare and Augusten (Burroughs)!
Don’t withhold your wisdom! Upon me, bestow it!
Inspire me! Show me how best not to blow it!"
 
To their books I turned for some worthy advice;
I was pumped to return to my work in a trice.
So across clacking keyboard my fingers they flew,
With a speed and a passion—and no typos, too.
 
Hour after hour, the prose kept on flowing,
Though I had no idea where my story was going.
“But write it, I must!” I decided right then.
I resolved to see this project through to the end.
 
At one a.m. the second act came together,
At two I knew this book was better than ever!
My hero had purpose, my plot had no slack.
I cut my “B” story and never looked back!
 
I got up to make coffee at quarter to three;
Curses! My spouse left no Starbuck’s for me!
With instant crystals I’d have to make do.
Cripes! He used all of the half and half, too!
 
“I could add some Kahlua,” I told myself.
“There’s a big, honking bottle right there on the shelf.”
So I added a splash. And then a splash more.
At five, I finally came to on the floor.
 
With more Kahlua than coffee in the cup nearby,
An idea for the third act I wanted to try.
Werewolves! In high school! And vampires, as well!
It worked for that Meyer chick, my book’s a sure sell!
 
I tied up the plot in a neat little a bow,
With the arrival of aliens, and giant worms from below.
Defeated were foes of the Earth and the sky,
And thousands of townsfolk did not have to die.
 
With the Kahlua bottle all but drained,
I turned to do the last bit of work that remained.
To this one tradition, I was happy to bend.
Two carriage returns, all in caps: THE END.
 
I sprang to Facebook, to announce I was through.
From thence, on to Twitter, and MySpace too.
But lo, I exclaimed as my face met the sun,
"Twenty-four days late, my NaNoWriMo is done!"

 

This is a cross-posting from April L. Hamilton‘s Publetariat #fridayflash blog.

#fridayflash: Writer's Night Before Christmas

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Twas the night before Christmas and all through my draft

Were examples of my inattention to craft

My characters all hung about without care,

In hopes that a plot point soon would be there.

 

My family were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of red herrings danced in my head.

The dog on its blanket, and the cat in my lap

Had just settled themselves for a long winter’s nap.

 

When on my computer there showed a blue screen!

(And if you use a PC, then you know what that means.)

Away to the cell phone I flew like a flash;

I dialed tech support and broke out in a rash.

 

The sales pitch that played while on hold I waited

Ensured my tech guy would be roundly berated.

That is, if he ever should come on the line.

And for this, per minute, it’s one-ninety-nine!

 

“Good evening,” he said, in a Punjab accent,

“I am happy to help you, and my name is Kent.”

More rapid than the Concorde was his troubleshoot,

I was back up and running, after one last reboot!

 

"Now Gaiman! Now, Atwood! Now, Cheever and Austen!

Salinger! O’Connor! Shakespeare and Augusten (Burroughs)!

Don’t withhold your wisdom! Upon me, bestow it!

Inspire me! Show me how best not to blow it!"

 

To their books I turned for some worthy advice;

I was pumped to return to my work in a trice.

So across clacking keyboard my fingers they flew,

With a speed and a passion—and no typos, too.

 

Hour after hour, the prose kept on flowing,

Though I had no idea where my story was going.

“But write it, I must!” I decided right then.

I resolved to see this project through to the end.

 

At one a.m. the second act came together,

At two I knew this book was better than ever!

My hero had purpose, my plot had no slack.

I cut my “B” story and never looked back!

 

I got up to make coffee at quarter to three;

Curses! My spouse left no Starbucks for me!

With instant crystals I’d have to make do.

Cripes! He used all of the half and half, too!

 

“I could add some Kahlua,” I told myself.

“There’s a big, honking bottle right there on the shelf.”

So I added a splash. And then a splash more.

At five, I finally came to on the floor.

 

With more Kahlua than coffee in the cup nearby,

An idea for the third act I wanted to try.

Werewolves! In high school! And vampires, as well!

It worked for that Meyer chick, my book’s a sure sell!

 

I tied up the plot in a neat little a bow,

With the arrival of aliens, and giant worms from below.

Defeated were foes of the Earth and the sky,

And thousands of townsfolk did not have to die.

 

With the Kahlua bottle all but drained,

I turned to do the last bit of work that remained.

To this one tradition, I was happy to bend.

Two carriage returns, all in caps: THE END.

 

I sprang to Facebook, to announce I was through.

From thence, on to Twitter, and MySpace too.

But lo, I exclaimed as my face met the sun,

"Twenty-four days late, my NaNoWriMo is done!"

 

Lowered Expectations, Or the Dregs of Stupid

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[Publetariat Editor’s note: this post contains strong language.]

Does lowering our expectations mean that we’re settling?

Is settling a bad thing? Or does it reflect our maturity and experience in weighing what’s best to meet our long- and short-term objectives?

This is all about writing, of course. You can take any inferences of relationships to another blog and cry your little eyes out there.

Months ago when I made the decision to go full-throttle with the writing, I thought that I was publishing my writing with renewed optimism, lofty goals, and shoot-for-the-sky objectives. Then I re-read 29 Jobs and a Million Lies as I was revising it and adding dialogue, and I realized what a totally different mindset I was operating with years ago when those tales occurred. If I had launched into writing back then, I’m not sure I would be making the same decisions I am now. For those of you who have read 29 Jobs, you know that I head straight into things balls-out, changing directions like a Dominican cab driver in the wrong lane on the BQE.

My expectation was that I would find–watch out now, brace yourselves–an agent.

I tried to find an agent. I did. Dan and Marc both know I tried hard. Even Miss Pitch. And then I stepped back, took a look at my 3 dozen or so rejections after only one request for a manuscript (by William Morris, I might add!) and thought, fuck, there’s got to be a better way. Why the fuck am I wasting my time?

And here I am, writing an unending series of flash fiction at Year Zero, meeting amazing people as I whore myself all over twitter, completed first novel and holding out til the spring to release it, and publishing 29 Jobs on my own with a lot of help from kind souls who built the website and pulling me through the muck of formatting.

Now that’s optimism: I changed directions rather than settling for what one could construe as less. Less than a contract? Nah, just different route to garnering readers. And that’s what a writer does, attract readers. Whether you earn $ doing that is another story altogether. I never knew before I submerged myself in learning about the publishing industry that the monster pub companies could let authors go back to day jobs. It seemed totally incongruent to me. It changed how I thought altogether and learned quickly that (a) writing a book isn’t that hard [let’s not talk about originality or quality of writing at this point] and (b) that’s why so many people do it. The market is flooded with books and authors.

Would books be better if authors all could quit their fucking horrible day jobs? Think about the hypothetical: we’re in a Platonic society where writers are subsidized so we get to spend all day thinking and telling stories and writing. Where is the barrier to entry? What’s to keep the dregs of stupid from declaring themselves a writer? (Who’s to say I’m not the dregs of stupid?)

Now, I ask myself again, have I lowered expectations? Or have I reoriented my expectations using the information about publishing and my own appetite for the masochistic formulas, restrictions, and limitations of the mainstream print publishing industry?

I know my answer, and I’m pleased with my decision. Fuck them, ups to DIY, is the response you expect me to blurt out. Sure, on first glance that’s where I am. But I do continue to dream larger, so that 20-something who made an ass of herself in 29 Jobs is still in here somewhere, despite having that same ass kicked all over the place, getting beat down but having tried everything. No Regrets. NO MOTHERFUCKING REGRETS.

…however: I Want More. (readers?)

word.

Have you lowered your expectations? Do you know what you want?

Piracy

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This post, from Luke T. Bergeron, originally appeared on his mispeled site on 10/21/09.

Merry Holidays and all that noise. I wanna talk about copyright today. Everyone and their Mom is talking about copyright and piracy recently, so I thought I’d join the fun. Keep in mind, these musings are long (as all my musings tend to be), so please bear with me.

We begin personally, as all my musings begin. I believe that the individual viewpoint is how we all see the world first, so it’s a comfortable and easy place to begin. So let’s start by talking about how I came to this in the first place.

It’s hard for me, as a content producer (sure, maybe the content is bad, but I’m still producing it) and also a content consumer, to understand how I feel about copyright and piracy (also called file sharing). I’ve thought about it a lot, because I am the guy who releases content I spend hours (months) on to people on the internet for free. I’m also the guy who will read/watch things that are legally available for free (Doctorow’s fiction, Hulu content) and sometimes pay if I like it and sometimes not. I’m also the guy who would someday like to be compensated for my work, at least to a level that I could scrape by an income and do it full time.

So…mix all those things together and you’ll soon realize that the ideas don’t jive with any logical consistency, not without some creative and double-sided accounting. I’m on the verge of releasing a new novel for free on the internet, a work that took me the better part of 18 months, and before I do that I feel like I should get my head on straight about copyright and file sharing. I wanna know how I feel about it so I can stick to my guns and also not feel like I wasted my time or limited my options in a way I’m uncomfortable with.

The real issue goes beyond digital piracy to copyright itself. Now, I don’t believe that digital file sharing, even of copyrighted materials, is theft. That’s probably a generational thing, but we’re gonna do our best to suss out as much meaning as possible. Keep in mind, this entry is a fluid conversation, so comment if you wanna participate.

So, theft seems to me like it is inherently defined by defined by the taking of something from someone else, depriving them of it. Theft is a physical concept, based on a starvation economy, that there is a finite amount of resources to go around, and possessing resources means someone else will not possess them.

Information used to be like that, too, since information was passed on via physical items. The price of a book was determined by two things: the cost of production and the cost of the information. The starvation economy also played into this, because there were only so many copies of the book. Stealing a book from a shop meant that the shop owner no longer had a copy to sell.

But the thing is, a starvation economy does not apply in a digital age. Or, at the very least, the costs are so absurdly low that the profit margins are absurdly high in monetized digital distribution. We exist in a world where time is monetized, and that’s the only cost for me to release a book. The fifty bucks a year hosting costs I pay to the website company are nothing. So all it costs me to put a book out on the internet is time, the time to write the book, edit it, and format it for distribution. Putting a copy of my book on someone else’s hard drive costs nothing and does not take the book from my possession. I’ve made a copy at no cost.


Read the rest of the post (it’s very lengthy, and there’s a great deal more thought-provoking stuff in it), and check out the debate going on in the comments section as well, on Luke T. Bergeron‘s mispeled site.

Google Book Promotion: 5 Easy Ways

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This post, from Bob Baker, originally appeared on his Bob Baker’s Full-Time Author Blog in September, 2009.

If you think this is going to be about search engine optimization, a Google AdWords campaign, or Google Book Search … think again. Here are five things Google offers that you should consider using to connect with readers and promote your books:

1) Display your live event schedule with Google Calendar. Most people use this popular feature for personal appointments and scheduling. But you can also choose categories on your calendar to make public — and even embed them on your web site … AND make it easy for people to add your events to THEIR personal calendars. Visit this page for more details.

2) Help fans find your public appearances with Google Maps. This popular application is the next best thing to having a GPS system in your car. You can use it to find places you drive to, of course. But a really smart idea is to include Google Maps links to each event you speak at, not just the venue address.

Sure, fans can "map it" themselves. But why not save them a couple extra steps and provide a direct link? Learn more about Google Maps here.

Tip: Look up a venue address on Google Maps yourself first. Then click on "Link" just to the right of "Print" and "Send" to get the code.
 

Read the rest of the post, which includes three more Google Book Promotion ideas, on Bob Baker’s Full-Time Author Blog. Bob Baker is the author of 55 Ways to Promote & Sell Your Book on the Internet, among several other how-to books for indie authors and musicians. Learn more about Bob Baker by visiting his website.

Self-Publisher’s 5-Minute Guide to Book Printing Processes

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With all the talk about print on demand, digital printing and the future of the publishing industry, it’s easy to forget that we’ve got books to produce in the here and now, and we need to know the best way to produce those books today, this week. Okay, we only have 5 minutes, so let’s dive in.

Podcast: Self-Publisher’s 5-Minute Guide to Book Printing Processes

[Publetariat Editor’s Note: Click the link above to open the podcast in your computer’s default media player program. Alternatively, you can just read the text of the podcast, provided below.]

Three Ways to Print Books

There are actually three distinct technologies to print books, all of which are widely used. Let’s quickly run them down and see where each comes into play.

  1. Letterpress—This was the main printing method from Gutenberg’s day until the middle of the twentieth century. In one way or another, type, pictorial engravings, or etched metal plates made from photographic originals are inked and then paper is rolled over them, transferring the image to the paper, one sheet at a time.

     

    Letterpress technology led to large, automated presses. You can see just how versatile this printing method had become because it overshadowed all other forms of printing for over 400 years.

     

    Letterpress is still in use today for very fine limited edition books, and in areas of the world where electricity is unreliable. A letterpress that’s powered by a foot pedal can run for many years with just a lube, and doesn’t need power at all..

     

  2. Offset—Offset printing’s development at the beginning of the twentieth century was sparked by the accidental discovery that an image transferred to paper by a rubber covered cylinder was actually sharper than the image from the original type. This offset image gave rise to the name offset printing.

     

     

    Komori 38 Web offset press

    Komori 38 Web offset press. Each of the four towers prints a separate color.

    With the advent of industrial uses of photography and advances in paper and platemaking materials, photo-lithography, the making of printing plates through the photographic process, allowed offset printing to overtake letterpress.

     

    In sheet-fed offset, paper is fed to the press and printed one sheet at a time. In web offset, special presses are used to print from a large roll of paper which, as it travels through the press, forms the web for which it is named.

    At the end of the press the paper is cut into individual sheets. Bindery equipment to fold, trim and assemble the printing job is often set up right at the end of the press, allowing the printer to complete a printing project in one pass from blank paper to a finished, assembled job.

     

  3. Digital—Digital printing, the result of marrying a computer-driven high-speed copying machine to computer-driven bindery equipment, is the fastest-growing form of book printing today. Computer servers hold separate but coordinated digital files for the book’s cover and interior text block.

     

    At a request from the operator or a computer instruction, the files are downloaded to the printing end of the press and imaged with toner in the same way your high end copier images copies. The resulting pages are combined with a color-imaged cover. The whole book is glued together and trimmed. Some digital printing equipment can produce an entire book, color cover and all, in just seven minutes.

     

    The major difference between letterpress and offset printing, on one hand, and digital, on the other, is that digital printing is designed to create one copy of a book at a time. The other, earlier methods of printing produce books in stages, and only work efficiently when producing many copies at once.

Comparing the Three Printing Methods

Well, now we know about the three printing methods, but how does that help pick the right one? Here’s how each printing method is best used:

  • Letterpress printing is used almost exclusively for fine, limited edition books. The characteristic “bite” of the type into the paper, and the resulting subtle texture it adds to the page is impossible with other methods. These books are usually made with lavish materials and can cost hundreds of dollars each.

     

  • Offset printing is used for the majority of books produced today. Web offset is used to make mass market paperbacks, like the ones sold in racks at supermarkets and at airports, and for very large printings of other books. Sheet-fed offset book printing offers the best quality reproduction of artwork and photography, and is the most flexible when it comes to the number of sizes offered for books and the different kinds of paper available for printing.

     

  • Digital printing is increasingly being used in the print-on-demand distribution model that’s becoming so popular. Larger publishers are moving their backlist books to digital printing, saving money on warehousing and shipping. The self-publishing phenomenon has created a huge demand for digital printing through print-on-demand distribution, since it has eliminated almost all of the cost of putting a book into print.

     

In Summary: Use letterpress printing for very fine, limited edition collector’s books. Use web offset for mass market and very high volume books that don’t need to be high quality. Use sheet-fed offset for print runs over 500 copies or where high quality reproductions are needed. Use digital printing where print runs are very short or where you have no need of an inventory of books.

This is a cross-posting from Joel Friedlander‘s The Book Designer site.

How I Became A Self-Publisher

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The Beginning

Back in the early 1970’s, I served in South Korea with the US Army Intelligence. I spent 3-5 hours a day 4 days a week studying the Korean fighting art of Hapkido (a mixture of Korean Karate and Japanese Jujitsu). Unlike Judo, we had no reference manuals; however, the art had over 1,000 techniques. I decided to write a definitive manual.

In 1974 and 75 I posed with fellow students for technique pictures and wrote all the text. In 1976, I was stationed at Ft Huachuca, AZ. I submitted my proposal to Rainbow Publications (Black Belt Magazine). They turned it down because they had just published a Hapkido manual by the Korean actor, Bong Soo Han, who had been in the Billy Jack Movies. It was poorly written by a ghost writer, but they depended on Bong’s name selling the book. The word quickly got around the martial art community that it was poorly written, so it didn’t sell well.

Although I sent proposals in to other martial art publishers over the years, hoping than my credentials as the 1st non-Korean to attain a 3rd Dan black belt and instructors certification would make me acceptable. No luck, so I put it on a back shelf and got busy with other things.

In 1985, I attended an American Booksellers Association Expo (now called the BEA) and met with editors from Rainbow Publications and the second largest MA press, Unique Publications (Inside Kungfu Magazine). This time I was able to establish credibility and was asked to submit. Rainbow turned me down again because they didn’t want to compete against their own book. Unique accepted, and I finally had a foot in the door.

Two months before an assignment to Munich, Germany in 1986, I mentioned to them I had an idea for a military fighting manual based on Hapkido and other arts. They got excited, since they had nothing for the military in their backlist, and asked me to go ahead. I wrote it in the next 6 weeks and then flew out to Burbank, CA on my own dime to honcho a photo session with their models.

The night before the shoot at dinner, my editor told me I had to eliminate half of the techniques. That was a huge amount of stress to sacrifice half of my book overnight, but I did. The next day, despite an ear infection and a 103 degree fever, I coached the models through the remaining techniques and flew home the next day to get doctored up before driving my van across country to ship it from NJ to Germany.

In 1987, I received a box of my 2nd book, Survival on the Battlefield: A Handbook to Military Martial Arts. They had decided to publish it first and never gave me a chance to review the proofs, so I didn’t have the opportunity to correct technical mistakes they made. The next year, the same thing happened with Hapkido: The Integrated Fighting Art, except it was much worse. Instead of issuing a 2-volume set of every technique from white belt to 2nd degree black belt, they decided to issue a broad brush overview, cutting out techniques but not editing out references to these poor dead spirits. On top of that, the cover was ugly. I was heart-sick. It was like seeing my baby stillborn.

At the time, I was touring Germany on the weekends doing author signings and appearing on a TV talk show on AFN. I was advertising in GI magazines. I finally decided that my third book, Surviving Hostage Situations, would be published by me. My experiences with the major niche publisher and reading Dan Poynter’s wonderful self-publishing manual gave me the courage to make that decision. I arrived back in Kansas in 1989 just in time to pick up my first 1,000 copies of my third book from the printer. My next post will address how my press, Universal Force Dynamics Publishing, came to be and why it became a success.

 

This is a cross-posting from Bob Spear’s Book Trends Blog.

How To Write The Best Critique Ever

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If you’ve ever belonged to a workshopping writers’ community and have made your work available for critique, you’re probably all too familiar with a certain type of singularly insulting and useless feedback. And you’ve probably wondered why the authors of condescending and mean-spirited critiques are so…well, condescending and mean-spirited.

At last, I’ve found the answer in the following little-known and closely-guarded set of instructions to which only the most self-important reviewers are made privy. If you’ve ever been on the receiving end of one of these more-writerly-than-thou types, I’m sure you’ll recognize some or all of the instructions given.

As one of the more accomplished members of any of a number of writer community sites, you are no doubt aware that there are a bunch of barely literate boobs who post their so-called “manuscripts” online in hopes that worthy experts such as yourself will see fit to magnanimously drop a few pearls of wisdom on them, thereby helping them to elevate their work from absolute tripe to mere garbage. While it may seem a terrible waste of your precious time and rare gifts to offer these bumbling idiots your wise and insightful critiques, you must do it because keeping your peerless views to yourself is virtually a crime against humanity. Think of it as charity work.

The rank amateurs who seek your advice are like little children who don’t know when they’ve done wrong, and must turn to an authority figure such as yourself for a firm hand and guidance. Don’t make the mistake of addressing them as equals to yourself, thinking perhaps that as impossible as it may be for them to actually be your equal, adopting a friendly or informal tone will put them at ease. You don’t want them at ease, you want them at full attention, respectful of your status as their superior and perhaps even a little fearful of you.

With respect to the content of the review itself, disregard whatever you’ve read in the sample reviews provided by the site to which you wish to post. As we savvy experts know, such samples are only there to deflect litigation. These sample reviews would have you mention the bright spots in each manuscript, and perish the thought, even compliment the author wherever possible. Remember, dear reader, that regardless of what the writer wants, what he really needs is to be told, in painstaking and tortuous detail, what you think is wrong with his work. And note particularly that I’ve said ‘what you think’; forget about Lajos Egri, Joseph Campbell and other supposed “experts” in the field, the only thing that matters here is your opinion. While such artsy-fartsy, lit hippie types may encourage writers to cultivate a unique "writer’s voice", you know there are rules for a reason and rules must be followed.

When reading through a sample, pay no attention to such trifles as tone, plot or characterization. You’re on a search-and-destroy mission to identify each instance of rule-breaking and mock it mercilessly. As you undoubtedly know, adverbs and flashbacks have no place in a professional-grade manuscript, nor do shifts in point of view (however purposeful), nonlinear time, or vampires, among countless other things. Don’t hesitate to berate the author thoroughly for his inclusion or use of such hallmarks of the novice.

Choose your words carefully. Don’t gently prod the author with a tactful note indicating that something in his manuscript does not meet industry standards or for that matter, your own, better standards; limit yourself to saying that his work “screams amateur”, or accuse him of failure to do his “homework”—this is a particularly good choice of words since it reminds the author that his proper place with respect to you is like that of a child with respect to an adult. Use the most inflammatory and provocative language possible in your reviews. Don’t say that action passages are ‘unclear’, say they’re ‘inept’. Don’t say that dialog ‘doesn’t sound natural’, say it’s ‘laughable’, ‘backward’, or even better, ‘lame’. If there’s one thing these would-be novelists must learn and learn quickly, it’s that Trade Publishing is a cruel and faceless mistress; it is your solemn duty, dear reader, to acquaint your charges with feelings of rejection, self-doubt and despair. As the song goes, you must be cruel to be kind, so try to make your reviews as pointed and hurtful as possible.

There is some disagreement among those in the know where using specific references to a given work sample in a critique is concerned. There are those on the one side who favor this approach, arguing that it provides much more opportunity to insult the writer while adding a personal touch. Then there are those others who prefer vagueness, arguing that the best way to keep the writer guessing is not to give him anything at all to go on. I leave the decision on this point to you, dear reader, but strongly admonish you that if you choose to cite references from the writer’s work, you nevertheless limit your remarks about that citation. For example, consider this excerpt:

“The car chase sequence on page 52 is about as exciting as watching my kid race his Hot Wheels. If you knew anything about writing action you’d know that you need to add more tension here. If you weren’t so clueless, you might have included more innocent bystanders, or maybe had the protagonist’s driver get injured so that the protagonist has to take the wheel of the limo. Try not to be such an idiot in your rewrite.”

At first blush, this excerpt seems like a fine example of the reviewer’s art. The reviewer uses appropriately harsh language and peppers his remarks with insults, but he also makes the unfortunate mistake of giving the writer an idea of how to fix the problem in question. How can we expect them to learn if we spoon-feed them the answers? Resist the temptation to share any suggestions for improvement, even knowing as you must that you are capable of wrenching any manuscript, no matter how awful, into a masterpiece.

Finally, don’t forget to share something about yourself in the review. Informing the writer that your enviable level of expertise and wisdom comes as a direct result of having placed third in the Busted Truck, Nevada Novel Derby is not bragging, it’s merely stating a fact of which the writer should be aware. Don’t let your ignorance about the writer deter you from asserting that you are undoubtedly better informed and more experienced than he. After all, by asking for your critique he’s already said as much himself, hasn’t he?

And don’t worry that being as yet unagented and unsold somehow detracts from your position of authority. As all of us on this preternatural wavelength of talent know, the small minds of ‘the industry’ are simply not ready for our caliber of work. Their shallow wants and self-serving agendas allow no room for a true visionary, and maybe if they’d answer a query or return a call once in a while they would have a chance at breaking the first real talent they’ve seen in their miserable little lives!

But, I digress.

In conclusion, too many reviewers mistake the workshopping process as a democratic support community when it is, in fact, a theocracy intended to provide a platform for we, the truly gifted few, to cut down the endless rows of talent-free hacks like so many stalks of wheat before the scythe, thereby discouraging any further progress by these also-rans who fancy themselves writers. Do not neglect your duty, and you are sure to be among the Top Five reviewers on any sites you frequent within a month.

(In case anyone reading hasn’t yet picked up on it, this is satire. If critiquers would do the exact opposite of the instructions given here, I think aspiring authors everywhere could share their work a little more freely, and breathe a little easier)

This is a cross-posting from April L. Hamilton’s Indie Author Blog.

Author (and Teacher) Seth Harwood Talks Craft

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You may know Seth Harwood as a podcaster and novelist, but you may not know he’s also a creative writing instructor and lecturer at Stanford University. Herewith, Seth answers some questions about craft.


Publetariat: What’s the most common problem or weakness you find in the work of your students?

SH: The first thing that comes to mind is a lack of using scenes.

With a lot of beginning writers, they’re more interested in getting into a character’s head and telling a wide open story than they are in creating specific images and the kind of scenes that a reader can really imagine. One of the things I see that can really help is getting the writer to slow down, to create images and characters on the page that seem three dimensional, that a reader can experience at the same time as he or she is reading. I’m a big fan of the idea that the reader and the writer are co-creators of the story. There has to be room to let the reader’s experiences and imagination in.


P: Many writers struggle with crafting realistic dialogue. Do you have any tips for dealing with this problem?

SH: Yes, again, it comes back to scene and making sure the dialogue exists within one. In my classes we do an exercise around using action and dialogue together. A lot of times dialogue can turn into just two (or more) talking heads: words on the page without bodies in a space saying them. It’s important to keep the characters’ bodies involved in the reading experience.

The other tip I suggest is always reading your dialogue out loud. This can really help catch a lot of "the wood."


P: In educational programs on writing there’s typically an emphasis on literary fiction. Yet your first novel, Jack Wakes Up, is in the crime/noir genre. Coming out of your MFA program, how did you make that transition?

SH: Well, that’s a great question. I was writing short stories for a long time and love that form. I still love short stories and as a student-writer, I learned so much by working with them. I really got a sense of beginning/middle/end and the composition of a piece that would’ve been very hard to learn if I were just working on novels.

But then as I tried to publish a book, everyone urged me to go out on the market with a novel. "Write your novel," was the advice I kept hearing. So I spent some time working on novels and I was dissatisfied with my first attempts. It wasn’t until I started to introduce more action, comedy and thrilling characters that I really started to feel the sparks and enjoy myself while I was writing. Ultimately, I had to face the fact that I had influences that weren’t just from books: I love movies, TV shows, video games, and I had to let some of that into my writing. When I did that, JACK PALMS CRIME was born!


P: Mainstream publication of short story collections has been on the decline for years but there seems to be a resurgence of the form in ebooks, and in fact you’ll be coming out with Kindle editions of your short story collections on December 27. Are the skills needed to write an effective short story different than those required to write an effective full-length novel? Can working in one form improve one’s work in the other form?

SH: Yes, absolutely. As I said above, I think short stories are a great learning tool, a form you can really cut your teeth on. There’s something so important about being able to start a story, finish a draft, then revise it… and revise it… and… you get the picture. Finally, you can finally call a story done and move on to a new one. There’s something about this process of starting and finishing that I think speeds up the learning process for writing. After all, writing is revising in large part. Because a story is so much smaller, it’s easier to learn revision on them.

And yes, it’s exciting that now I have a chance to do something with my short story collection using ebooks and Amazon’s Kindle platform! For a long time I thought the stories just needed to be shelved because no mainstream publisher would publish them–and this is with twelve of the fifteen stories having been published in literary journals! Now I’m able to bring out the stories myself on Kindle and see if I can get my online audience behind them. We’ll find out on Dec. 27th, when A Long Way from Disney hits Amazon’s Kindle store.


P: Thousands of writers have recently completed draft novels as part of National Novel Writing Month, and many of them are now thinking about next steps, such as workshopping and revision. Do you have any advice on how to approach this stage of the writing process?
 
SH: Yes! First of all, I’d let those NaNoWriMo novels sit for a while. At least a few months. They were written in such a frenzy that it’ll take a while for the dust to settle and the writer to be able to look at the pages for what’s really there–to separate what’s still in his or her head from what’s down on the page. In a few months, it’ll be time to start revising those novels. When that time comes, the best place to start is with a fast read-through of the whole book. Read it and make notes on what’s there as well as what needs to change to make the story the one you really want. It’s a big rush of creativity during NaNoWriMo. Writers have created A LOT of material to work with. Now it’s time to use the revision tools–cutting, rewriting, reshaping–to make that material into your book. Save the polishing for last. Don’t start editing/changing single lines until the last steps.


P: In your upcoming Stanford Online Writer’s Studio class, The Essential Art: Making Movies in Your Reader’s Mind, the focus is primarily on craft but you will also be devoting some time to the current publishing environment and author platform. This is unusual for most creative writing classes and programs. Do you feel these topics should be included in any university-level creative writing program? Why or why not?
 
SH: I think it’s important to include these topics because they lead to writers being enthusiastic. They lead to writer-excitement, which is in small supply these days. I find that when my students start to see ways they can share their work and start generating their own audience–through social networking and free serialized audiobook podcasts–they get very excited about creating new work; they get inspired. I’ve seen this make a great deal of difference in their attitude, approach to the page, and general feelings about writing. So yes, I think it’s important to include.

That said, the main focus of this class is craft: literally showing how to write in such a way that a reader co-creates the narrative in a mental movie as she reads–goes from words on the page to visual characters and scenes in her mind. That’s what we’ll really be building in this class: the tools to take words and turn them into moving images for readers.

 

Seth Harwood received an MFA in fiction from the Iowa Writers’ Workshop. He has taught creative writing at the University of Iowa, UMass Boston, and the City College of San Francisco, and his fiction has appeared in more than a dozen literary and crime/noir journals. His first novel, Jack Wakes Up, which he first serialized as a free audiobook, was published by Three Rivers Press (Random House) and reached #1 in Crime/Mystery and #45 overall in books on Amazon.com on the first day of its print release.

Registration is now open for Seth’s upcoming Stanford Online Writer’s Studio class, The Essential Art: Making Movies in Your Reader’s Mind. The class runs for 10 weeks, from January 11 through March 19.

Excerpt from Christmas Traditions – An Amish Love Story

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"If it wasn’t for these ornaments thou gives me each year, the tree wouldn’t look near as pretty," said Luke, bending with his hands on his knees to inspect the presents. "Which one of these presents is the ornament thou brought this year, ain’t?"

"It’s a small package." To look among the pile of presents, she leaned over as far as she could without dragging the popcorn strings on the floor. "I don’t see it under the tree. Either your father left it in the sleigh, or he dropped it in the snow between here and the barn," Margaret dared to say in a scoffing tease, giving Levi a sideways glance.

"That’s the thanks I get for helping thee, is it?" Levi countered back.

He actually smiled at Luke and her. What a switch! Not that Margaret intended to read anything hopeful into his actions. As long as she’d known Levi, she knew he could go from hot to cold in a second. Oh how she wished no matter how slight it might be that Levi would have a change of heart for the better that would last.

She could tell Luke appreciated his father’s placid mood at that moment, too. "It’s fine. I’ll go look in the sleigh. Daed, would thou please put the popcorn strings on the tree for me? Thou are taller. Thou can hang them higher than I can so the strings are evenly spaced. We need to get that done quick. Poor Aunt Margaret’s arms must be tired. She won’t want to stand like that all night." The boy rushed to the kitchen door. He twisted around. "Just don’t start on the ornaments until I get back. I want to be here for that."

"Never would have thought to wait for you if you hadn’t said so," said Margaret with a teasing laugh.

Luke grabbed his coat from the nail by the kitchen door and put it on. He pulled his gray, woolen mittens out of a pocket and yanked them over his hands. He had his hand on the door knob when his grandfather called after him.

"Take the lantern with thee, Luke. It’ll be too dark in the barn to see the sleigh let along a small package in it. While thou is out there check on the cow again. Save me a trip."

"All right, Dawdi," agreed Luke. Lighting the lantern that hung on a nail next to the coats, he held it out in front of him as he went outside.

"You heard your son, Levi. Start draping these popcorn strings over the branches before my arms give out," Margaret dared to order.

"Daed, thou want to help her?" Levi looked at Jeremiah for a way out.

"Ach! I’m too old. I’ll just watch the two of thee have the fun," Jeremiah quipped dryly, stroking his bushy beard.

Finding no way to decline, Levi sauntered across the room to stand beside Margaret. They looked at each other until she broke eye contact when he took an end that dangled from her arm. As his warm fingertips touched her wrist, Margaret’s skin tingled. Her pulse sped up. She flinched and drew her arm back slightly. When she shrank away, his intense gaze flickered over her face before he twisted back to the tree and looped the string over the branches.

"Levi, the boy seems to be happy," Margaret ventured softly, hoping for a break in the chill of resistance she felt radiating from him at having to be so near her.

Lifting the popcorn string up high to drape it over the branches at the top of the tree, Levi answered, "I told thee he was. No need to spoil that. Not if thou cares for him as thee says." Was it possible that Levi’s voice soften? Or, did she just want to believe that. Was she hearing something that wasn’t there?

"I just want to do what’s right," Margaret maintained.

"For who? Luke or thee?" He searched her face as he took the next string from her arms.

Just for a moment, Levi’s eyes seemed warmer somehow, but his words didn’t sit well with Margaret. She glanced across the room at Jeremiah. His eyes closed, the old man’s head relaxed against his rocker. His shallow breathing lead her to think that he’d dozed off.

Just the same, she kept her biting voice low to keep Levi’s father from overhearing. "That’s not fair. If I was thinking about me, I’d impose myself on you more than one time a year to see Luke."

Levi held the popcorn string in mid air, ready to lay it over a bough. He twisted toward her and retorted, "Strong willed as thee are, Margaret, peers to me if thou wanted to have done that, not much way I could have stopped thee. Always thought that lawyer man thou married had more to do with thou not protesting how often thee comes to see Luke than the shunning did."

"Don’t blame this on my husband after all these years. You’re the one who said that once a year was all I could come," insisted Margaret, feeling her efforts to defend herself futile, but she felt the need to try.

"I did say that," Levi agreed vehemently. "That should have been the last time I spoke to thee as long as thee are under the shunning. I had to kneel for confession before the bishops soon after talking to thee to keep from being shunned myself. I confessed to permitting thee to stay here this week in December. Thou could have gone before the bishops also if thee had the desire to lift thy shunning. That would have made things so much easier for both of us." He made a wide scallop of the string over the boughs and turned back to her for another string.

Margaret noticed he purposely didn’t continue with what he had to be thinking. Lifting the shunning also included the fact that she would have to come back to live with the Plain people. That was the only way. Levi knew that wasn’t an option for her because of her marriage to Harry.

When he did finally break his silence it was to rehash their agreement. "If thou recalls, thee is the one who picked the week before Christmas to visit Luke. The day also happens to be Luke’s birthday. Not just one, but two very important days in that little boy’s life that I allowed thee to be here with him." Levi hadn’t mince words. He stooped to drape the last string over some of the tree’s lower branches.

"Luke needs a woman in his life, Levi," Margaret stated quietly to his broad, strong back.

Levi straightened and spun to face her. "Faith gave that right up when the boy was small. As far as Luke knows she died. We are going to keep it that way." His narrowed eyes froze her. "Thou didn’t want the job either as I recall," he said curtly, wanting to make how he felt very clear.

"You never understood." Margaret lowered her gaze. Even if she could get the words out, it was way too late to defend her reasons for giving away Luke. She bit her lower lip to stop it from visibly quivering. She couldn’t cry now. She’d appear weak. The only way to stand up to Levi Yoder was to remain cold and strong just like him. She’d learned that a long time ago. Never give that man the upper hand where Luke was concerned. She wanted the child in her life no matter how short a time she had with him. But she knew if she angered Levi beyond reason, the man was as good as his word. He’d never let her see her son again.

Levi glanced toward the kitchen. "Seems like it’s taking my son too long to find that ornament. It’s cold out there. I should go help him. Maybe something’s happened with the cow." He started toward the kitchen.

 

 

Margaret thought, feeling let down because Levi had tried to put a damper on her pleasant evening. Levi speaks bluntly and runs away.

 

                                                        Chapter 5

Levi paused with a hand on the door facing and stared into the dark kitchen. He whirled around. With his head slanted to one side, he studied Margaret. "Tell me the truth for once. Why didn’t thy husband come with thee this time?"

Margaret didn’t know how much longer she could hold up under Levi’s probing. She wished he’d just leave the subject of Harry alone. She gazed at the floor while she rubbed the prickly feeling away in her left arm caused from holding it out straight so long. She always felt as if Levi could read her mind. He certainly could tell if she chose to lie to him. In a barely audible voice, she broke the vow of silence she’d made to herself on the trip out from town. She blurted out, "Harry left me."

"Did he?" Surprise was in his voice. "The lawyer man did know the truth?" Again Levi’s slanted eyes raked over her face as he questioned her, trying to read her mind before she answered him.

She hated that Levi kept pushing. If being truthful was what he wanted, she’d be truthful since he asked. Maybe he would ease up on the way he treated her if he knew the truth.

"Not until a few days ago," she admitted.

Levi pounced in front of her. He poked his finger under her chin and raised her head so she had to look at him. Gazing down at her, he asked incredulously, "Maggie, thou never told him before this?"

Out of words, Margaret shoved his hand away and lowered her head. She nodded no slowly, contemplating the one word she’d just heard that surprised her. In the midst of this heated discussion, Levi called her Maggie. The mention of that long ago term of endearment was a reminder of happy times in her youth. For many years now, Levi hadn’t used the nickname when he spoke to her. She had always felt lucky if he managed to call her Margaret Goodman. But now that he was so worked up, he didn’t seem to realize he’d called her by her nickname. Strange what it took to rattle this man. He remained cold and distant or angry when discussing his son with her but seemed on the edge of exploding when he talked about her husband.

Levi grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her as if that would dislodge her answer. "Why not?"

"Because I knew Harry finding out about you and me would hurt him. I feared he’d leave me," Margaret stated flatly, pulling away from his rough grip.

"Ach! Why tell him now then?" Levi said with a frustrated sigh. "If thou thought that, just leave the truth hidden. The fewer Englishers who know the better. Burn thy sister’s devil book and let well enough alone."

Margaret’s admission came painfully slow, because she knew it would only infuriate Levi further. "Because I promised Faith I’d give Luke the journal this year. If Luke was to know the truth now, I had to tell Harry first. Eventually, you know very well my husband would have found out somehow if I hadn’t. To find out from someone else wasn’t fair to him. It would have hurt Harry much more than my telling him."

"Is what’s in that journal thy only reason for telling Harry Goodman?" Levi asked, searching her face as though he expected more.

She didn’t understand. "What other reason would I have?"

Levi stared at her. His unwavering eyes filled with sadness. "Thou should have stayed home with thy husband this time. If thou had kept silent, his leaving thee would never have to be. Now what are thou going to do when thee leaves here?" Levi’s voice held a note of concern. In his eyes was tenderness. His face soften while he waited for her reply.

Or was she imagining his feelings toward her changed. She’d wished for that to happen for so long. Her resolve to be cold and defiant melted away. She wasn’t used to this type of emotion from him. He hadn’t displayed a hint of gentle feelings toward her in years.

Margaret sighed deeply. "Perhaps you’re right about me not giving Luke the journal. He’s well and happy with the way he believes things to be. After all these years, surely Faith is gone for good. What difference could it make to her now if I didn’t carry out her wishes if that’s the way you want it. I’ll give what you say some thought in the next few days. As for me, you needn’t worry. Harry gave me the house so I have a place to live. He’s using the time I’m here to move his things out." She sighed again. "The worst part will be trying to explain to the busy bodies in town why my husband left me. They’ll notice sooner or later."

"Don’t try to explain. Tell them it’s none of their business. Or better yet just ignore them," Levi said, his tone soft and husky.

"If only that would work," she said, doubtfully.

Suddenly, Margaret felt so very weary from the weight of her world being turned upside down. One thing she was certain of, she could only blame herself for what had happened to her

recently. Her sister, Faith, wasn’t there to blame for her misfortune this time. She sagged closer to Levi. He placed his hands gently on top her shoulders. His gaze didn’t budge from her face as he slid his hands until he touched her throat. With his thumbs, he caressed her neck. Mesmerized by his gaze and touch, Margaret felt helpless to pull back even if she had wanted to. Her pulse pounded under his thumbs. Levi lowered his head close to hers. He tucked a finger under her chin to lift her head up. She held her breath, daring to hope that Levi intended to kiss her.

"Oh, Maggie, —-," he whispered.

At the sound of Luke’s footsteps in the kitchen, Levi dropped his hands to his side. The boy watched his father glide away from Margaret. Luke paused in the doorway. Fearing tension between Levi and Margaret, the child hesitated in the door. He’d been raised with the belief that harsh words and raised voices were a forbidden sin. Margaret knew the only time heated moments occurred around Luke was when she visited. She saw the alarm on the child’s face. She hated what Levi and she did to him. They continually tugged that little boy back and forth between them like a piece of pulled, molasses candy.

Luke looked from his father to his aunt and back. In one hand, he held a small, snow covered package. In the other, he grasped a black book bound with twine.

Margaret’s breath caught.

Levi let out a low groan.

"The journal must have slid out from under the sleigh seat where I hid it," whispered Margaret out of the corner of her mouth to Levi. "He mustn’t read it yet."

"Come on in and warm up, son. Cold out there tonight, ain’t?" Levi invited, holding his hand out to encourage his son to enter the room.

 

Always the same pattern,

At Mediabistro's Ebook Summit

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This post, from Laura Dawson, originally appeared on the LJNDawson Blog on 12/16/09 and is reprinted here in its entirety with her permission.

Yesterday I was at Mediabistro’s eBook Summit, an event that actually spans two days (but I had to take one day to get this newsletter out, so there you go). They opened with a session on Open Road, the company founded by Jane Friedman and Jeffrey Sharp.

Jane and Jeff were interviewed by Carmen Scheidel of Mediabistro, who gave Jane and Jeff a chance to explain exactly what Open Road is, and what it intends to do.

Apparently they are looking at backlist titles with an eye towards both ebook and movie products. Their example was William Styron, whose books make good movies ("Sophie’s Choice"); there is also some extant footage of Styron himself that’s never been widely available. And it’s high time his books were available as ebooks.

Additionally, they are publishing what Jane calls "E-riginals", which are ebooks native to Open Road.

When Carmen brought up the memo from Markus Dohle at Random House regarding digital rights (and many of the books Jane would like to publish are, in fact, Random House books), Jane very carefully stated: "We are only working with people who represent that they have those rights to sell to us." This she repeated a couple of times.

Open Road is also working with universities, which of course are great repositories of authors’ papers. And they are developing apps – Jeff cited an app that would lead tourists around Charleston, highlighting Pat Conroy’s haunts.

Some discussion from the Q&A – all answers are Jane’s:

What will it take for traditional publishers to thrive once again? "I think there will always be physical books, and it’s essential that we keep them. But some of the issues of traditional publishing have to change. Advances are difficult, The idea of chasing the bestseller is very very difficult. Most of the time if you chase the bestsellers, you don’t make money. We are in a secular change – meaning we are not going to go back. Publishers will get smaller, advances will go down, and nonreturnability of books is essential. Each publisher will find his or her way; it’s going to be a tough decade, and the balance between e-publishing and physical publishing, the e-world is going to get pretty close to representing 50% of the publishing business."

How will readers purchase your ebooks? At what price? "At this point we are thinking of standard list price as around $14. But again, nothing’s definite. We have to see what the audience will bear. All of the marketing that we are doing will live on OpenRoadMedia.com. Pieces will be pushed out everywhere else. But we are not selling books from our website. We are auditioning distributors. We are agnostic – we will be on whatever device exists. We will distribute and have our books sold everywhere ebooks are sold."

Could you talk about the kinds of deals you’re making with authors for backlist and e-riginals? "We are in 50-50 partnership. Our intention is to be a 50-50 partner with a content owner."

Are you encountering resistance from traditional authors that ebooks will erode print sales, and how do you mollify those concerns? "Number one, we have to respect the author. If Sherman Alexie doesn’t want his books on e-, that’s okay. The issue of erosion is like the issue of price. We need every possible consumer and every possible purchase we can get. We cannot turn away a customer. I do not believe that the publishing on e- should be delayed. That’s TODAY. I cannot be dogmatic. Do I think there will be some cannibalization? Yes, but we are building a new audience and we have to satisfy that audience. It’s extremely important for us to face this head-on – perhaps we will increase the reading audience rather than cannibalize the audience. Traditional publishers have very big nuts – their overheads are beyond anything that’s understandable by people who don’t work in a big company, and the erosion of hardcover sales WILL hurt their bottom line."

How do authors reach you? "We say that we are not accepting unsolicited manuscripts. If it’s agented or with a lawyer, we will accept solicitations."

 

CEO of LJNDawson, Laura Dawson provides consulting services to publishers, libraries, booksellers, and book industry service providers. Her clients have included McGraw-Hill, Audible, Ingram, and LibreDigital. She was also a co-founder of the StartwithXML project. Laura blogs at the LJNDawson Blog where you’ll find frequent updates on technology, publishing, bookselling, libraries, and industry gossip.

 

For Writers: Get Off Your Ass (Whether You Want To Get Paid or Not)

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This post, from Jennifer Topper, originally appeared on her Don’t Publish Me! blog on 11/10/09 and is reprinted here in its entirety with her permission.

If it takes an hour to write 1000 good, solid words, at let’s say, $35 per hour, and we’re talking about a 75,000 word novel, that novel should net you $2625. It’s valued at a literal price of $2625. Ok, you can bump it up, what with revisions and all. 

Or is $35 per hour too low? You think your writing is worth more?

Partners at major New York law firms list their hourly rates at $750-1100 per hour. Paralegals, though they don’t get paid this much, are billed to clients at about $200 per hour. You think a good novelist is worth more than $35 per hour?

Shrinks cost about $200-350 per hour, with or without insurance.

Getting your car fixed is about $70 per hour for the labor. Parts are separate.

What about a clogged toilet or other plumbing problem? Expect a baseline of $150 for the plumber to come to your home, and then about $200 per hour in labor costs thereafter.

I’m sorry, did you say you think your writing should be valued at more than $35 per hour?

Because you can go down the street and get raped at McDonald’s for $7 per hour of ballbusting work.

Or you could be a cook, like I did, and work 18-hour days and take home $120.

Maybe we can bump that writer’s rate up a notch, to include the marketing we must do for ourselves to get our books on shelves, and to get people to know who we are. How many hours will that cost? We can build it into our overhead.

*
So what I’m getting at is this price versus value argument we’ve seen so much about. Why is it important? Because as we (writers) agonize over who’s going to publish our work and what are we going to get out of it, the form and medium must come into play. If going to e-readers is going to lower the cost of production and therefore more dollars go into our pockets, then great, I guess?

But does that mean fewer books sold and more money? Yeah, kinda. In the indie record business, my argument to sign bands on my independent squat of a label as opposed to their signing with the big boy labels was that they’d get a better split with me– 50/50 versus the bigboy’s convoluted royalty-advance formula, which left little-to-nothing for the bands after recouping "costs" of production and marketing. (Well, the trustee appointed by the United States Bankruptcy Court of the Eastern District of New York-Brooklyn "valued" my surplus CDs at $0 so that I could seamlessly file a Chapter 7 (no liquidation) bankruptcy, hence the dumping of CDs in the East River on a dark night.) So it depends what you think you’re in the business of writing for: selling books for money or spreading your gospel. The two objectives are not mutually exclusive.

Are independent bands’ objectives that much different than writers’? I guess it depends–sure, we would all like a few extra bucks in our pockets. Doing it for the ahhrt? Please. Doing it because we HAVE to? In a metaphorical kind of way I would buy that argument.

Here’s where the bands and the writers diverge, though. Every band knows that to get a following they need to tour. They need to tour like crazy and do shows in every nasty corner of every bumfuck city. Are writers doing the equivalent of that? Or are they waiting for their publisher to hook them up with a few readings near where they live on the weekends between 2pm-4pm but no Sunday because my kid has soccer practice? See where I’m going with this? Every writer must be pounding the pavement and knocking on doors to get their books on shelves, whether that book is released digitally or otherwise, the work must be done at the grassroots level to cultivate a following. Readings, doing posters and handing them out at stores, crafts fairs, schools, universities, senior centers, homeless shelters: get your ass out and READ to the people whom you ostensibly wrote for. How the hell else are people supposed to know about your work–by the cover of your book? (guffaw, guffaw)

We value our work because we think there is enormous intellectual value. But without an audience, that value cannot be quantified. Writing without an audience is therapy. Last week I posted about offering advertising space on my book. I don’t see anything wrong with that. I mean, I do, but really, we’re in business, let’s face it, we need to earn a buck. And maybe someone who places the ad will be interested in reading your book. (just one, is all it takes.)

With that said, I can’t WAIT to get going on it. I’m going to self-pub 29 Jobs and a Million Lies and get it in everywhere I can. Then I’ll adapt it to a screenplay and whore myself to indie film production houses with a copy of the book and get the damned movie made. And so on and so forth, with Getting the Gang Back Together (working title to be completed by 12/1/09), and the Intuitive Cookbook (completed, just need photos…anyone?). DIY style.

word.

Jennifer Topper is the author of 29 Jobs and a Million Lies, and member of the Year Zero Writers Collective.

How To Feature On The Most Influential Websites In The World

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Being a writer is a business. If you write books or articles, you want people to read them and preferably pay you for it. It would be fantastic if lots of people paid you for writing because then you’d be Stephanie Meyer, but we’ve all got to start somewhere!

So how do you get readers?

One way is to cultivate small groups on niche websites, speak in person, communicate with individuals on social networks and maintain your own quality blog and web presence. All this is definitely important!

But you must also go where the people are.

If you have a presence on the most important sites on the internet, more people will find you. The current list of most influential sites from Read, Write, Web include:

  1. Wikipedia.org
  2. YouTube.com
  3. Flickr.com
  4. Twitter.com
  5. Google.com
  6. MySpace.com
  7. Facebook.com
  8. IMDB.com (movie site)
  9. NYTimes.com
  10. Apple.com

How do you get on these sites?

The big guns on the internet have been around for years or are celebrities. It’s taken me around 18 months to build a small, but growing, online presence, so don’t expect to get there overnight. But here are some useful posts to read around why and how you can use these influential sites. The brilliant thing is – they are all free!

Wikipedia: Everyone is using Wikipedia now for online research. It has been shown to be as correct as the Encyclopedia Britannica, and a recent interview with Jimmy Wales, the founder, discusses accuracy. Here is a useful article on writing effectively for Wikipedia. I am in the process of trying to write my own Wikipedia page so I’ll do a post on this when I have learnt it myself!

If you doubt social media at all, read this first => Writers need social media, and social media needs writers

 

YouTube.com: Now you can get a cheap Flipcam or iPod Nano with video, it is easy to get on YouTube. You can also use your webcam for a static picture, or build your own video using stills and music. Here’s a post on how to build your own Book Trailer using free software MovieMaker. I have been doing a series of videos on my NaNoWriMo experience which have just been one take with my iPod Nano. And of course, the poster boy for video is Gary Vaynerchuk, whose 10 book deal for Harper Collins I discuss here. Here’s my YouTube channel if you want to connect.

 

Flickr.com is a brilliant site for photos that I mainly use for Creative Commons photos for this blog, and my ebooks. However, it is also picked up in search engines and people go looking for photos there for other projects. I have had several of my photos featured in various online articles, which have all been linked back to my site. So it also works as a traffic tool. It is definitely worth creating a page and loading some photos on it, even if it is just your book covers, your promo photos and media appearances. Here’s my Flickr site.

 

Twitter.com. You may have noticed I love Twitter. It is my primary social network of choice and I am very active on it @thecreativepenn. There’s a good reason too – it is HUGELY popular now and brings traffic to my site as well as enabling some fantastic online relationships. If you don’t know anything about Twitter yet, read this article first. Then go ahead and join up!

 

Google.com People use Google to find things by searching. If you want people to find you by searching, you need to have a blog that is regularly updated on your niche topic. Here’s how to setup a blog, and here’s 10 tips for effective blogging for authors.

Facebook: How authors can use it for book promotion. You can also join The Creative Penn fan page if you want to connect with some more people!

 

Apple.com. You can get into the Apple Store in a few ways.

a) Create your own podcast and syndicate the feed to iTunes. Here’s 5 Steps to Make Your Own Author Podcast. You can Subscribe to The Creative Penn podcast here on iTunes.

b) Create your book as an iphone app. Al Katkowsky did this – here’s an interview with him. Here’s an article with 13 Tools for Building Your Own iPhone App. This is definitely on my list for 2010 so I’ll post a how-to article when I have done it!

 

That may all be a little overwhelming, but the point is that you can be on the top influential websites in the world. There are people there and you need to be part of the conversation.  These are all key aspects of author platform building which is what publishers want these days, so you just need to put some time in and it will start to make an impact.

This is a cross-posting from Joanna Penn’s The Creative Penn site.

Is It Time To Kill 'Jerry'?

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In 2000, screenwriter John Blumenthal self-published his comic novel, What’s Wrong With Dorfman? after his manuscript had been rejected 75 times. (You know, I have to admire a writer who believes in their book that much. I’m not sure how anxious I would be to resubmit my book after 30, 40, or 50 rejections.)

In any event, people kept telling Blumenthal how much they loved the book, even though they were rejecting it for publication. So he decided to take matters into his own hands, set up a publishing company, and self-published his book.

 A Self-Publishing Success

Dorfman was selected by January magazine as one of the 50 best books of the year. Blumenthal went on to get other major reviews and eventually sold the book to St. Martin’s Press.

Blumenthal has also published with Simon & Schuster and Ballentine. He sold over 4,000 copies of his self-published What’s Wrong With Dorfman? by working relentlessly at promotion. But he realized his company, Farmer Street Press, would need someone to play the role of publisher. That’s how “Jerry” was born.

As he said in BooksnBytes.com,

There was no Jerry. Jerry was me. Every self-publisher should have a Jerry, although you can call him Bob or Moishe or Deepak, it’s up to you. Jerry was the front man. He put his name on press releases etc. I wanted people to think Farmer Street Press was a real company. Unfortunately, I had to fire Jerry because we just didn’t see eye to eye on a lot of things.

“Jerry” Has Plenty of Ancestors

Before so many people jumped into self-publishing, we tried mightily to disguise what we were doing. Somehow a publishing company run by John Smith (for example), publishing a book by John Smith, publicized by a PR person named John Smith does not, perhaps, convey the best message to those you are trying to sell to. Or at least that’s what we thought.

One of my publishing mentors, Felix Morrow, created the Mystic Arts Book Society, an early negative-option book club. He had to have a monthly magazine in which the editor picked the books for the month and wrote them up for the membership.

Felix realized that among the many new books he would be promoting through his book club, there would be some he couldn’t sell himself. Felix had a long history as a writer and publisher and some of the subjects Mystic Arts dealt in were considered to be “fringe” or “alternative” or “counterculture” at the time.

His solution: he created an editor for his book club, John Wilson, who was really Felix’s alter ego. As John Wilson he could find books for his members and had complete freedom to write the copy he needed for his monthly newsletter.

As Felix would say, when we talked about the possibility of duplicating his book club in the 1990s, “I needed John Wilson. He could say things that Felix Morrow could never say!”

Time to Kill Them Off?

We’ve entered a whole new world when it comes to self-publishing and independent publishing. Like musicians a few years ago, it’s now seen as useful, almost obligatory, for authors to have direct contact with their readers, and we are constantly being bombarded by advice to “build our author platform” and “dialogue with readers” to establish a “community of interest” around the books we write and publish.

In this new model, it’s authenticity that counts. We have authors blogging about their creative process, about their editorial progress, about how much money they are making from the sales of their books.

On Twitter we can follow our favorite authors and interact with them in ways we never could have imagined a few years ago.

With this wave of contact, communication and authenticity, do we really need the “Jerrys” and the “John Wilsons” of the past? Authors now establish publishing companies, hire editors, designers and book printers, and proudly declare themselves author/businesspeople in the marketplace.

It could be time to kill these guys off. What do you think? Do we still need to keep up the artifice, to pretend we are really a small publisher, not a guy in the dining room with a laptop? Would it matter any more? Leave me a comment and let me know what you think.

This is a cross-posting from Joel Friedlander’s The Book Designer site.